Iron Man

I just had to add this. I was just surfing off emails and for no particular reason filled in a questionaire 'Which Superhero are You'. Now I don't know about you, but if you ever do these, as I occasionally do for amusement, I don't see the point of not answering as correctly as possible. Mind you, there's nothing to prove it isn't rigged anyway, so don't start sending comments about questionable authenticity. We've been all through that before.
I fort one ov yer answers was a bit questionable.
Which one?
Do you wear a bra?
Well I don't.
Wot 'bout Fersday night cross-dressers meeting then? Gotcha there. I've seen yer. P'radin' around in yer 'igh 'eels
Clive...FUCK OFF!

Your results:
You are Iron Man

Iron Man 80% Spider-Man 50% Robin 50% Green Lantern 50% Wonder Woman 45% Catwoman 45% Superman 40% Hulk 35% The Flash 35% Supergirl 30% Batman 25%

Inventor. Businessman. Genius.

Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...


They're all getting on a bit now though.

Couch Surf

I belong to a worldwide friendship collective called CouchSurf. I have been a member for about six months and have had the pleasure of hosting members from all over the world, and from these, lasting friendships are emerging. My pleasure is the meeting with new people from all sorts of backgrounds and cultures, and the opportunity to share some of my life's experiences with them. They in turn have somewhere to stay for a few days whilst on route, or, as is beginning to happen now, people are specfically coming to see me.

I wrote about Dorota and Pawel's banquet, so now wish to add a mention of the C.S. guests who joined us for the New Year. Amber and Teresa arrived on Dec. 29th, They are American girls presently living and working in Spain, part of a uni project back home.

The following day Judith and her two travelling companions, Jan and Marilyn arrived. They are from Quebec, but currently studying in Lithuania. So, with South African lodger Leo (pic taker) and Teresa's new Spanish boyfriend, Roberto, we were quite a mini-league of nations.This was us before they trooped off to the beach for the midnight celebrations, returning later to continue the party.
I wanted to take some pics then but me cam'ra wou'dn't work.
That is because I removed the memory card, anticipating you might have thoughts along such lines and capture snaps of my guests in uncompromising positions.

A special mench to Amber (she's the crazy bird blendin' in wiv the wall) with whom I had a most deep and meaningful interaction, resulting in she giving me three weeks to define 'ist'.
(It wuz you who sed she wuz crazy Zizz. Wot the 'ells a ist when it's at 'ome?
Well that is what I have to define Clive. There is a condition. She reserves the right to challenge each and everything I say or claim if it in any way is directed at her personally, ie, suggesting the suffix applies to her.
Like wot duz that mean?
Well, it means she does not subscribe to being an 'ist' herself.
Like 'feminist' an' 'mefferdist'.
Basically,
Or Boodist, eh Zizz. I wudn't 'av minded showin' 'er a few ov me rope tricks.
Any wordsmiths who fancy having a shot at defining 'ist' themselves, please go ahead. I will be most interested to read opinions on this off-beat subject, as I am sure my new-found young American friend will.
Well, I fort she wuz alright, even if she wuz madder than cheese. I'll remember 'er.
And so will I Clive, and not just for the bottle of Temperanillo they brought from the famed Rioja area where they reside.
'Ere Zizz. D'you remember that Monty Pyfon sketch about Oz table wines.
Oh yes. Eric Idle as the Australian wine expert. How did it go?......

......A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh Australian table wines. This is a pity as many fine Australian wines appeal not only to the Australian palate but also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain.

Black Stump Bordeaux is rightly praised as a peppermint flavoured Burgundy, whilst a good Sydney Syrup can rank with any of the world's best sugary wines.

Château Blue, too, has won many prizes; not least for its taste, and its lingering afterburn.

Old Smokey 1968 has been compared favourably to a Welsh claret, whilst the Australian Wino Society thoroughly recommends a 1970 Coq du Rod Laver, which, believe me, has a kick on it like a mule: eight bottles of this and you're really finished. At the opening of the Sydney Bridge Club, they were fishing them out of the main sewers every half an hour.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is 'beware'. This is not a wine for drinking, this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

Another good fighting wine is Melbourne Old-and-Yellow, which is particularly heavy and should be used only for hand-to-hand combat.

Quite the reverse is true of Château Chunder, which is an appellation contrôlée, specially grown for those keen on regurgitation; a fine wine which really opens up the sluices at both ends.

Real emetic fans will also go for a Hobart Muddy, and a prize winning Cuivre Reserve Château Bottled Nuit San Wogga Wogga, which has a bouquet like an aborigine's armpit.

Classic stuff.

Let's Do a Bit of Stretching

Home Stretch











Red Neck Stretch











Lada Stretch








Hoped For Stretch













Mishap Stretch








A Texas Stretch











Fer gawd's sake Zizz, wot is this?

Well. She is being stretched.

Yeah I know Mate, but it's a bit outta place amongst the others.

Not really, there is a horse.

I ain't gonna argue wiv you but I fink that is takin' fings too far.

It is an image that will appeal to the BDSM subculture enthusiasts, of which I can tell you, there are plenty. I am starting a new religion.

Why should you change to BooDiSM?

Simple. BooDiSM offers whatever the advantages are of other religions, but eliminates all the hypocrisy. For example, you get someone tangible to worship. Master Boo. A guy to look up to. He works out, smells good and is a definite hit with the ladies.

Compare with some emaciated geyser who can't afford a razor or a decent pair of sandals. Or some aged who has never had sex, (allegedly), but says you have to whip it out just when you get to the short strokes. What sort of advice is that?

And of course you will not be confronted by some bloke in a dress, (unless you attend the Thursday evening cross-dressers' meeting. This week Jeremy will be wearing the latest off the shoulder creations from Top Shop……but that's another story.)

We won't take your hard-earned cash and spend it on expensive buildings, lavishly ordained with precious metals and stained glass, where you can give praise to some virtual entity. With BooDiSM you get 21st century reality. For starters we don't want your money. We will make shed-loads through our web-shop, where you will be able buy quality products at discount prices. BooDiSM WILL SAVE YOU MONEY.

Our meetings will be held in down to earth, dungeonesque venues, captively furnished, where you will receive personal hands-on attention. The experience will be so uplifting; you will want to hang around forever. And if you are a newcomer, don't worry; you will quickly be shown the ropes.

And the music? None of this mass karaoke stuff. With BooDiSM you get to play the organ yourself. Get really involved. (By the way, check out our latest CD - a compilation of greatest hits, including classics like I Know the Ropes by The Boy Scout Trio, and the unforgettable Can I Hang Around with You by Cecil and the The Chain Gang.)

Maybe the guys reading are thinking, "All this is for the girlies. What about us?" Well, you are not forgotten boys. Every month we will have special services performed by Mistress Boodicea. She can whip up a congregation to a fever pitch like no other. If you want to give praise, she will definitely have you on your knees.

WE ARE NOT PREJUDICED. All the other religions have it in for somebody or other. Not BooDiSM. We welcome everybody. Well, maybe not quite everybody. Those bloody kiddie-fiddlers can fuck right off, excuse my French.